


Holding On (and letting go)

by providing_leverage



Series: Short stuff [8]
Category: Shadowhunters (TV)
Genre: Alternate Universe - Canon Divergence, Correct until the time skip, Multi, haha - Freeform, that will never happen now
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2020-01-08
Updated: 2020-01-08
Packaged: 2021-02-27 06:40:42
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,068
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/22172713
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/providing_leverage/pseuds/providing_leverage
Summary: Jace Herondale, hero of the Shadow World, died at three in the morning on a cold Thursday.Cannon divergent, the One Year Later will never happen
Relationships: Magnus Bane/Alec Lightwood, Post Clary Fray/ Jace Herondale, Simon Lewis/Isabelle Lightwood
Series: Short stuff [8]
Series URL: https://archiveofourown.org/series/1477400
Comments: 1
Kudos: 42





	Holding On (and letting go)

Jace Herondale, hero of the Shadow World, died at three in the morning on a cold Thursday.

Three blocks away the love of his life slept, not remembering that he existed and that she had once watched him die beside a lake, killed by the man that was both of their father's, in different ways.

This time he was not next to a lake, but in a dark alleyway. This time he did not even realize he was dying. The stinger of a demon pierced his heart and pumping poison into his body before he could move to draw his blade.

Across the city the woman who called him son and the woman who called him brother sat in a bookshop long closed, holding cups of hot chocolate and wondering what to get him for his birthday. They pull up an online shopping store and order a book of sheet music for the piano, which he will never play.

All three of these women who meant so much to him lived on, unaware of his fate.

But in a loft in Brooklyn, a Shadowhunter lay asleep in a cold bed, dreaming about his husband who he misses. Said husband sat in an uncomfortable chair in Switzerland, attending a conference when he'd much rather be home with the love of his life.

Because the warlock was halfway across the world when it was nine o'clock he was not next to his husband when he woke up screaming at three o'clock.

Screaming and crying and begging for what he knew to be true to be incorrect.

÷÷

There was such a stillness in the loft.

Simon hated it. The second his foot crossed the threshold he fought off the urge to turn and run away as fast as his undead legs could carry him.

There seemed to be no air here, and it was stifling even though Simon no longer needed air. But he did not run, because he was not here for himself.

Instead he squeezed his girlfriend's hand as a show of support, though it probably didn't help much. 

Magnus, looking so  _ wrong  _ without his make-up and in only a ratty pair of sweatpants and a shirt that must be Alec's, leads them inside. The place is a mess like Simon hasn't seen since-

Well, since before Alec moved in here and never let it get too cluttered. 

"How is he?" Simon asks when it seems no one else is going to say anything.

Magnus doesn't say anything, just waves a hand to the bedroom door. Izzy takes the first step, but Simon is right behind her. Their hands are still linked.

Alec Lightwood, Head of the New York Institute and legendary Shadowhunter in his own right, does not look very legendary at the moment.

He looks, thinks Simon sickeningly, like the corpse of his parabatai they burned yesterday. Worse actually, because Jace's body had been prepared.

Jace had not had a three days stubble beard, nor had his hair been tangled like a roll of yarn a cat at gotten it's claws on and then stuck in.

The golden Shadowhunter had been laid out on his back and looked beautiful even in death, cast in the light of noon streaming through the stained glass windows. Alec was curled on his side, face wet with sweat or tears or both, lit only by the bulbs in the hallway that made their way through the cracks in the door Izzy and Simon had come through.

"Alec?" Izzy speaks her brother's name in the same hollow but trying not to show it tone she's been using since they got the call about Jace.

The eldest Lightwood doesn't even open his eyes. Even when Izzy drops Simon's hand to sit on the edge of the bed and reaches out to touch his shoulder.

The only reaction they get is full body flinch at the contact. 

"Yeah, I've learned the hard way not to touch him." Magnus says lowly from the doorway. "I've already had by fair share of bruises and a black eye."

"Has he eaten anything?" Izzy asks.

Magnus shakes his head"No. I found his stele and put him to sleep with my magic long enough to put it in his hand and draw a nourishment rune. If need be I'll summon some things like they use in a hospital. IV and all that."

Simon remembers when his father died and his mom would disappear into her room for days at a time with bottles of whatever alcohol she could get her hands on. When she'd lay in bed for hours without moving, no matter how he or Becky begged.

She always eventually got up again, and her days in bed became less frequent and shorter. But Alec hadn't merely lost a loved one. No husband or brother could compare to what Jace had been to him.

Luke has tried to explain it to him earlier. Alec had lost his brother like Izzy had, but he'd also lost part of his own soul. Or at least a soul that had been entangled with his since his teenage years.

_ That's the danger of parabatai,  _ Luke had said,  _ you take two warriors and make them both better than they could be without each other. But if one dies it can take the other with them. Once I saw a pair, a woman and man, who I hunted with. The man was killed in a demon attack. The woman killed every demon there and when her blades could find no more demonic flesh, she put her knife through her own heart.  _

Simon let's his girlfriend sure there with her brother who had never liked him much. She sits there for several hours, and he stands guard. 

All the time he wonders who has it worse.

Clary, who lost her love of her forgotten life, and her guardian angel.

Alec, who lost his will and ability to function, drowning in the pain.

Magnus, who lost a man who he barely got along with and only tolerated for the sake of his husband, and in that death also lost the love of his life to a not quite death.

Or Izzy who lost both her older brother's and gained a load of responsibility in Alec's place with one unlucky stinger.

Most likely it was the world itself, who lost one of her most passionate protectors. 


End file.
